Category Archives: Home & Family

2 College Responses In, 7 to Go

My 18-year-old daughter Jessica has started to hear back from her nine college applications: hooray! She applied for admission to: Brown, Carnegie Mellon (& Music Conservatory), Lawrence (& Conservatory), MIT, Oberlin (& Conservatory), Princeton, Rice, University of Rochester, and Smith. So far, the University of Rochester
has accepted her (with a big scholarship) and MIT has turned her down. We
will hear from the remaining seven by 1 April. It was good to have the
first reponse be an acceptance. The email Jessica sent on 8 March when she
first heard was:

Hey, guess who’s in college!!!!!!!!!! Yay, I’m going to college! Only
another month to figure out which one….

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Gardening and Karel Capek

I have been preparing my garden for me to be away in India for several weeks. We have arranged for a housesitter and our daughter will also check in on our plants and pets (2 dogs, 2 cats, and a bird) but other than “mow-and-blow” upkeep, no actual gardening will be done. I have put down weed cloth and mulch and trimmed and tidied and hope that all is in readiness.

We have about 1/4 acre of yard and garden (including 170 feet of the Guadalupe riverbank) and all the plants and trees have just woken up for Spring. My almond trees are in full bloom, the jessamine vine flowers are just opening, the orange, apricot, and peach are in bud and I have pots and beds of daffodils and narcissus cheerfully nodding in day’s warm breeze. The weeds and stray grass are working to colonize any bare ground; snails and slugs are always with us. My garden is still recovering from the long hard frost we had last month. There are sections of bougainvillea and trumpet vine and bird of paradise which are yellow brown. I am not sure yet whether these hardest-hit plants will sprout green soon or are as dead as they look. By the time we are back, I will know.

Karel Capek is most famous for having introduced and made popular the word robot, which first appeared in his play R.U.R. (Rossum’s Universal Robots) in 1921. However, my favorite Karel Capek work is The Gardener’s Year from 1929. Here is Capek’s description of a dedicated gardener leaving on vacation:

[The amateur gardener] departs, however, with a heavy heart, full of fears and cares for his garden; and he will not go until he has found a friend or relation to whom he entrusts his garden for that time.

“Look here,” he says “there is nothing to be done now in the garden in any case; if you come and look once in three days, that will be quite enough, and if something here and there is not in order, you must write me a card, and I will come. So, I am relying on you then? As I said, five minutes will be enough, just a glance round.”

Then he leaves, having laid his garden upon the heart of an obliging fellow-creature. Next day the fellow-creature receives a letter: “I forgot to tell you that the garden must be watered every day, the best times for doing it are five in the morning and towards seven in the evening. It is practically nothing, you only fasten the hose to the hydrant and water for a few moments. Will you please water the conifers all over as they stand, and thoroughly, and the lawn as well? If you see any weeds, pull them out. That’s all.”

A day after: “It’s frightfully dry, will you give every rhododendron about two buckets of tepid water, and each conifer five buckets, and other trees about two buckets? The perennials, which are now in flower, ought to have a good deal of water — write by post what is in flower. Withered stalks must be cut off! It would be a good thing if you loosened all the beds with a hoe; the soil breathes much better then. If there are plant-lice on the roses, buy tobacco extract, and syringe them with it while the dew is on, or after a rain. Nothing else need be done at present.”

The sixth day: “I am sending you by express post a box of plants from the country…. They must go into the ground at once…. At night you ought to go into the garden with a lamp and destroy snails. It would be good to weed the paths. I hope that looking after my garden doesn’t take up much of your time, and that you are enjoying it.”

In the meantime the obliging fellow-creature, conscious of his responsibilities, waters, mows, tills, weeds, and wanders round with the box of seedlings looking where the devil he can plant them; he sweats, and is muddied all over; he notices with horror that here some damned plant is fading, and there some stalks are broken, and that the lawn has become rusty, and that the whole garden is somehow looking blasted, and he curses the moment when he took upon himself this burden, and he prays to Heaven for autumn to come.

And in the meantime the owner of the garden thinks with uneasiness of his flowers and lawns, sleeps badly, curses because the obliging fellow-creature is not sending him reports every day on the state of the garden, and he counts the days to his return, posting every other day a box of plants from the country and a letter with a dozen urgent commands. Finally he returns; still with the baggage in his hands he rushes into his garden and looks round with damp eyes —
“That laggard, that dolt, that pig,” he thinks bitterly, “he has made a mess of my garden!”
“Thank you”, he says dryly to his fellow-creature, and like a living reproach he snatches the hose to water the neglected garden. (That idiot, he thinks in the bottom of his heart, to trust him with anything! Never in my life will I be such a fool and an ass to go away for the holidays!)

While I am in the Garden City of Bangalore, I know I will enjoy being where I am (and not behave like Capek’s gardener!). I will visit the Lal Bagh Botanical Gardens and maybe bring back new gardening ideas.

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Interviewing for College at Starbuck’s

My daughter Jessica is now in the last half of her Senior year in High School.  All of nine college applications are in. She just finished her final vocal audition last week and recently participated in two of the final three alumni interviews. She is still trying to arrange a time for that last interview.

Except for those at the university admissions offices, I think all of Jessica’s interviews have been held at Starbuck’s coffee shops. A friend of ours who does alumni interviews for his alma mater says that Starbuck’s is sufficiently public that both the interviewer and candidate feel safe; also, there are lots of Starbuck’s shops around and they are usually easy to find. (I am currently re-reading Moby Dick in which the moral but pliable first mate is named Starbuck. The coffee shop chain is named for him.)

We are still getting letters from schools saying they are missing information already sent. For one school, she sent in her musical profile three times before they acknowledged getting it. I suspect that some schools are not as organized as they require their applicants to be.

We will be happy to be done with waiting to hear back. All of the schools are supposed to give Jessica their acceptance or denial letters by 1 April. One interviewer told her they would say by 15 March. Another school asked her to apply for a binding early admission (she declined). A third college had a professor write her a personal letter about his new program. I think all of this communication means that at least some of Jessica’s applications are well regarded. But I would still like to know for sure. I hate waiting.

We are sending in our 10th week summer Blue Camp Bear’s Lair reservations without knowing whether Jessica will be able to go or if we will have to cut our camping short to move her into a dorm.

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Family Photos

I just read Jonathan’s
Blog
entry on “My Family Photos – and ODF” and was reminded
of the months of work it took to prepare the family photo video
we made for my father’s 80th birthday last year. After reviewing
thousands of pictures, I picked 586 to include in the final version.
We made DVD copies for family members (and uploaded them to a
photo storage web site) so at least those photos exist
in more than one location but most of the images have never been
copied and are stored in plastic boxes in my basement.

We called the 2006 video “80 Years of Innovation & Entrepreneurship:
Wade Dickinson”. Some of the photos are of historical importance
(like the 3 we have from the one room schoolhouse he attended
in Hickory Township, Pennsylvania, or the hand colored portrait
of him as a West Point graduate) but most are of interest only
to relations:

Wade in 1929:

Wade Dickinson 1929,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson
One Room Schoolhouse 1931:

Wade Dickinson at the One Room Schoolhouse 1931,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson
Car Fans 1942:

Wade Dickinson 1942,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson
Wade at West Point 1947:

Wade Dickinson West Point 1947,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson
Our Family in 1964:

Wade Dickinson and Family 1964,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson
Wade in 1972:

Wade Dickinson 1972,
photo: copyright 2006 Katy Dickinson


Images Copyright 2006, Katy Dickinson

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Athletics and Disabilities

Today starts my son’s 2nd week participating in track and field as a Freshman in High School. Since Paul has a rich variety of learning disabilities
(social/cognitive, dyslexia, dysgraphia, etc.), sports is one of his hardest school subjects. Paul’s disabilities aren’t visible – he is a tall, hefty, and smart – which causes problems when he does not respond as expected. He went out for track and field because one of the coaches is also his Math teacher. They get along well and Math is Paul’s best subject. We hope that having a coach who already understands Paul will help him stay with running.

Paul was on the wrestling team in 8th grade last year. His team mates wrestled to win but Paul wrestled to learn how to be on a regular sports team. He set himself goals for his matches like: 1) don’t quit, 2) don’t bleed. Paul’s approach has much in common with the Athlete Oath for the Special Olympics:

    Let me win. But if I cannot win,
    let me be brave in the attempt.

It has been raining hard all afternoon but the coach told Paul last week that “Neither rain, nor sleet, nor snow, nor hail…”* will stop training runs. I just talked to Paul on the phone and he said he was “wet, wet, wet, wet, wet,” after running for hours in the rain. But he stuck it out!

* motto used by the U.S. postal service, adapted from Herodotus

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Wrestling and Gender

Since my daughter Jessica won the match in her last duel meet, she
went on to wrestle in the Varsity League Finals tournament last
Saturday. She lost her matches there so regretfully she will not be going
on to the next level of competition
(CCS Championships).

Jessica was one of three girls wrestling at Saturday’s tournament (all from
different schools). One
of the three (weighing 103 pounds) is going to CCS. The girls
all wrestled boys in the regular matches but Jessica and Rihanna (both in
the 125 pound class) wrestled each other at the end just for fun. They
had been in tournaments together several times but never matched with each
other. Rihanna won but it was a good match for both.

Wrestling is perhaps the only sport that sorts contenders only by weight,
not by gender. All of the tournament’s schools offer mixed gender wrestling teams
except one, a parochial school that only allows boys on the team. One of
the girls was told last week by coaches from the parochial
school that it was immoral for boys to wrestle girls unless they were
engaged to be married. Nonetheless, that same parochial school sent one of
their boys up against Rihanna on Saturday and he is going to CCS because he
won the match. The girls were disgusted with the sanctimonious
and duplicitous behaviour of the school’s coaches.

Part of the fun in being a spectator at a wrestling tournament is watching
the variety of contenders. The weight classes go from around 100 pounds
to well over 200 pounds. On Saturday, we saw every color skin, from cherry petal
pink to milk chocolate brown. We also heard names originating from all over the
world announced for matches. Some of the names on our daughter’s team
and at Saturday’s tournament: Goodman, Lao, Schwartz,
Mui, Hoffman, Olila, Davis, Spitters, Rao, Campbell, Peterson, Wang, Nguyen,
Taylor, Singh, Ramirez, Lozano, Kahn, Gold, Reed, Lee, Kwan, Park,
and Kowano.

Also fun are the t-shirt designs and slogans worn at tournaments. Most teams
have new wrestling shirts each year but wearing old shirts is encouraged.
Our former priest (Rev. Kathy McAdams) passed on her wrestling t-shirts to
Jessica just to keep them in current use. Some of the slogans we saw
at Saturday’s tournament:

  • There is no easy way
  • Catch me if you can
  • Competition is the process, domination is the goal
  • Wrestler Nation
  • Never Give Up
  • We Don’t Take Bull (for the Matadors team)
  • Cats (for the Los Gatos team)
  • Wresters Score in Every Position
  • DWD – Desperate Wrestling Dad (also Wife of DWD)
  • Combat Training
  • Pain is Temporary, Pride is Forever

Jessica looked at this list and said her all time favorite
wrestling t-shirt said:

    Yeah, I’m a Girl

    Yeah, I Wrestle.

    Yeah, You Lost.

    Deal with it.

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Consent to Overprotection

Someone gave us a subscription to Reader’s Digest for Christmas
and it has become our preferred household bathroom reading. An article
in the current issue is “Dad Overboard – confessions of a (way too)
protective parent” by Steve Doocy. The father writing the amusing article
is concerned that he was too protective raising his young son because the boy
was denied toy guns, swimming without a flotation device, and whole grapes
(a choking hazard).

I know many more parents who are overprotective than parents who
are inattentive. One of the causes of parental fear
and overprotectiveness may be the number of release forms we have to
sign listing the dire risks potentially associated with relatively safe
activies like field trips and school sports.

I was interested to read that in 2005 the Wisconsin Supreme Court
would not enforce an athletic center’s waiver: “…holding the release unenforceable because it was against public policy. The Court cited the following reasons for its decision: 1) the release was overbroad and all-inclusive; 2) the guest’s waiver of liability was insufficiently highlighted; and 3) the guest did not have the opportunity to bargain over the terms of the release. … The Court held that affording the customer the option of either signing the release or not using the facility is not considered a sufficient opportunity to ‘bargain’.”
(quote from
“Atkins v. Swimwest Family Fitness Center, 2005 WI 4: Wisconsin Supreme Court Decision
).

When my kid comes home with a release form I have to sign before she
can participate in a field trip the whole class is attending or
in a PE class, I sure don’t feel I have any right to bargain with the
school about the release terms. Hence, I doubt the forms are enforceable.
However, even parents with excellent English reading comprehension and
doubts about the legal validity of these ubiquitous release forms get
worried signing them. I can only imagine how American consent forms
trouble new immigrant parents.

Here are two examples of the dozen or so release forms I have to
sign each year for each of my kids:


Schoolname Athletics

Assumption of Risk Form


Student Name: _____________________________

In consideration of being allowed to participate in any way in the athletic program, and events and activities, the undersigned hereby agree to the following conditions.

  1. I acknowledge and fully understand the each participant will be engaging in activities which involve risk of injury. The injury could be serious or catastrophic including permanent disability.
  2. I assume all the foregoing risks and accept personal responsibility for damages following such injury, permanent disability, or death. If it is determined that my child needs medical or dental treatment while participating in athletics, I will be financially responsible for any treatment determined to be necessary by a physician, dentist, athletic trainer, emergency medical personnel, or any other medical personnel.
  3. I grant permission for the school’s sports medicine staff to care for and provide appropriate medical treatment for my child in the event of his/her injury.
  4. I Accept and acknowledge schoolname Athletic Code of Conduct.

__________________________________ Date _____________

Parent Guardian Signature

_________________________________ Date _____________

Student Signature


Parent’s Consent To Travel And Attend Field Trips In The State Of
California


This consent is given with reference to the following facts:

    A. The undersigned is/are the father and/or mother of ___________________________________________, a minor child
    who is a resident of the city of _________________________________________________,
    located in _______________________________________________ , __________________________________________.
    County or Province State/Country

    B. Said minor child is to be enrolled in schoolname during the 2007 summer school.

    C. The schoolname is a private school consisting of elementary and secondary grades.

    D. It is understood and agreed between me/us and the agents and employees of schoolname that schoolname will engage in educational activities outside schoolname locations at schooladdress California. More specifically, it is contemplated that the administration,
    teachers and staff of schoolname will conduct field trips to state and national parks, museums, universities, sporting events, plays and other entertainment activities. It is also contemplated that staff may on occasion be called upon to transport a child to an off-campus appointment or activity.

NOW, THEREFORE, I/We give my/our consent to schoolname to engage in the above described activities that the teachers or administration of schoolname feel will promote the education of my child.

FURTHER, I represent as follows:

  1. I/We have legal and physical custody of said minor child and am/are, therefore, competent under the laws of the State of California to sign this agreement.
  2. I/We acknowledge the fact that the staff members may be unable to watch each child at all times on field trips. In addition, I/we realize and specifically acknowledge there always exists the possibility of an unforeseen accident causing harm to my/our minor child.
    Nevertheless, I/we grant permission for my/our minor child to participate in the activities described above.

  3. In addition, I/we hereby release and agree to hold harmless schoolname as well as its agents, servants, employees,
    successors and assigns any and all claims my/our minor child may have against them for injuries and/or damages suffered by my/our minor child and/or his/her property while participating on said trips.

  4. I/We also hereby agree to indemnify and hold harmless schoolname and its agents, servants, employees, successors and assigns from any liability to third persons caused by the activities of my/our minor child while participating
    on said trips.

  5. This agreement is to be interpreted under the laws of the State of California, United States of America.

Signature of parent/guardian

Date


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