I was graduated with my Doctor of Ministry degree from the Graduate Theological Union‘s Berkeley School of Theology on 17 May 2025 – Hooray! I was surprised and honored at the graduation to be awarded BST’s Keith A. Russell Award for Prophetic Leadership in Community Ministry. My husband John, brothers Mark and Peter my Sister-in-Law Julie, daughter Jessica, Son-in-Law Matthew, grandson Alex, Son Paul, and friends Laura and Barbara were able to join the celebrations. It was a delight to have a cheering team. We graduates enjoyed taking pictures with our advisors and each other (especially the BST Student Council for which I have been the Vice Moderator for the last two years). I am continuing to take classes with GTU’s Center for Islamic Studies.
Images (c) Copyright 2025 by Katy Dickinson. If you want to receive Katysblog posted by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! field (upper right on Katysblog home page).
For the last month, my son Paul and I have been working through the complex and extensive paperwork associated with his father’s estate. Whether dealing with banks and investment firms, telephone and internet companies, government agencies, or anyone else, a key phrase is “I am sorry for your loss.” Sometimes this condolence is said with sincerity and compassion immediately after we inform them of a death in our family, but often any expression of sympathy seems to be an afterthought, arriving as long as half an hour into the discussion. I get the impression that public-facing managers are professionally trained to express condolences but some seem unclear on the concept.
I have been surprised at which companies were the most compassionate in their approach. My favorite response was from the Xfinity telecommunications company. The local Xfinity manager was remarkably supportive and kind. She said she too had recently experienced a death in her family, was sorry for what we were going through, and she was super-helpful in getting the account closed quickly. In contrast, the manager at the decedent’s primary bank was uninformed of bank procedures, tried to delay at every opportunity, and only said “I am sorry for your loss” at the end of an extensive and frustrating conversation. This was despite Paul being clearly listed as the “POD” (payable at death) account beneficiary. When we arrived back at the bank four days later for the first available appointment when he could help us, this bank manager’s boss came by and was much more supportive.
We have found that each organization seems to have different terms for dealing with death. Names for the death department so far include, “Estate Department,” “Estate Care Department,” “Life Events,” “Probate,” and “Wealth Transfer.” Such a strange reflection of how our culture reluctantly engages with a life event we will all experience in time.
If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home).
There have been many articles and videos recently about Swedish Death Cleaning, a process intended to remove clutter and save difficulties for your relations after your death. It was clear after my ex-husband Ben Goodman passed away about two weeks ago here in San Jose, California, that he was not a believer in this. I divorced Ben about thirty years ago but once you have children with someone, you will always be related. My son Paul and I have been taking care of Ben’s stuff since the early morning call came that he had died.
So far, Paul and I have notified the family, worked with the hospital and Neptune Society to manage Ben’s remains, set up his internment and memorial, cleaned out and closed out his apartment and one of his storage units, as well as notifying banks, medical, and governmental organizations to freeze his accounts. Going through Ben’s stuff has included finding bags of prescription medicines and sharps to be properly disposed of, food, clothes, and household items to be donated, as well as returning his hospital bed and wheelchair to Medicare. I have done two runs already to the CVS medication disposal site (where the boxes are now full), plus dropping off towels and blankets at San Jose animal shelter, and several trips to the Good Will donation site. Yesterday, the junk service picked up two full truckloads of well-used furniture, antique cables, monitors, phones, worn bedding, broken and dirty kitchen supplies, and other stuff we could not think of any other way to eliminate. Of course, Paul has separated out family keepsakes, photos, and financial records (since some actions have to wait for the Death Certificate to be prepared). We probably have another week of work ahead of us sorting out the paperwork now that it has (mostly) been disentangled from the junk.
We still need to sell Ben’s guns (fortunately all trigger locked), dispose of bottles of motor oil, and donate his old glasses to the Lions Club. We are grateful to have been supported by my husband John and several Task Rabbit freelance laborers who have helped us bag and move stuff. All of these required duties are entirely aside from dealing with our complex feelings about Ben’s death. Your prayers are welcome during this stressful time.
If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home).
Temporary Kitchenette in John Plocher’s Office, 8 September 2023
After 26 years in our home, we are updating our kitchen. Our Spanish Mission style house was built around 1931 in San Jose’s Willow Glen neighborhood (Silicon Valley, California). We think the kitchen was last remodeled after the big Loma Prieta 1989 earthquake. The kitchen is large but the layout is fixed by four doors (to John’s office, the laundry room, the basement, and the dining room).
We are keeping the original cabinets because they are solid oak and, while after so many years the finish is trashed, they are good quality, fit well, and are in the right places. We are replacing the pulls, hinges, and drawer slides, so that means rebuilding the drawer boxes. We are also changing two under-cabinet doors to be drawers. The update is limited to those cabinet changes, granite counters to replace the nasty cheap tile, a new sink and faucet, cabinet and wall paint, electrical plug upgrades, and three new appliances: induction range / stove, microwave, and sink disposal. The induction stove meant we also had to buy all new pans. There has been much discussion over microwave placement. John (the fancy cook) says he prefers it over the stove, so we bought a new microwave unit with a built-in hood.
It feels like camping out in our own home. John is patient with the temporary kitchenette we created in his office. (This is overseen by the Moltres Pokemon mural my mother Eleanor Dickinson and son Paul painted when that was his bedroom.) We are doing dishes in the bathroom. My birds are confused by their extended field trip to the dining room, where their cage is surrounded by boxes of china and kitchen stuff. The contractor came by this morning to say that the countertops will be installed tomorrow, and the cabinets and paint will be finished next week. Here’s hoping for that to happen as scheduled!
Nov 2022 John Plocher in old kitchennew kitchen stove, 31 July 2023kitchen backsplash granite slab, 17 Aug 2023kitchen granite shopping, 17 Aug 2023old kitchen 20 August 2023kitchen demolition 21 Aug 2023kitchen after counter removal, 21 Aug 2023kitchen electrical work, 22 Aug 2023kitchen with new backer boards, 24 Aug 2023John Plocher and curious dogs in kitchen 29 Aug 2023bathroom dishes 8 Sep 2023
Images Copyright (c) 2023 Katy Dickinson. If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home).
Katy Dickinson, Lee Satterfield, TechWomen 10 Year Honor, 20 October 2022
As 2022 is ending, I have been reflecting on how busy these last few months have been. In October, I mentored the remarkable and inspiring TechWomen Team Tunisia, and was one of the 21 mentors honored by the U.S. State Department – Bureau of Educational and Cultural Affairs for ten years’ service to the TechWomen program. (I was the TechWomen Process Architect 2010-2011, and have been a mentor each year since.) Also that month, my husband John Plocher said a fond goodbye to Apple, and started a new job at Ford Greenfield Labs.
Katy Dickinson, TechWomen 10 Year Honor, 20 October 2022Katy Dickinson, TechWomen Honor, 20 October 2022Katy Dickinson, Tunisia TechWomen, 16 October 2022John Plocher with Ford Mach-E
If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home). Images Copyright 2022 by Katy Dickinson.
The lyrics of “When I’m Sixty-Four” by Paul McCartney of The Beatles start, “When I get older losing my hair, Many years from now, Will you still be sending me a Valentine, Birthday greetings bottle of wine. If I’d been out till quarter to three, Would you lock the door? Will you still need me, will you still feed me When I’m sixty-four?” Tonight, I end my Beatles Year!
I start my new half-decade tomorrow. Such a delightful adventure!Katy Dickinson 1957Katy Dickinson 1961Katy Dickinson 1967Wade, Eleanor, Mark, Peter, Katy Dickinson, Bachelor of Arts Commencement, University of California at Berkeley, 1979Katy Dickinson 1980Wade, Eleanor, Katy Dickinson with baby Jessica 1989Jessica and Paul, Nut Tree Railroad, 1995Katy Dickinson, John Plocher, Wedding 2000Jessica and Matthew wedding 2011Jessica and Katy, Beirut, Lebanon, 2013Katy Dickinson, John Plocher, Lalibela, Ethiopia 2014Katy and Jessica, Sierra Leone 2019Katy and Jessica, Horseshoe Bend, Arizona 2019Paul D Goodman and Katy Dickinson, Cielo Lodge, Golfito, Costa Rica, August 2021Graduate Theological Union, Master of Theology Commencement, 7 May 2022John Plocher, Katy Dickinson, Loon Lake, Wisconsin June 2022
If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home). Images Copyright 1957-2022 by Katy Dickinson.
I am about three months into my weight maintenance program. As I wrote earlier, I started using the Noom program for weight loss and wellness in October 2021 and lost about sixty pounds by July 2022. Last month, I realized that Noom does not really offer a weight maintenance program, so I shifted to using the free Fooducate nutrition and weight tracker.
Fooducate is working well for me. I like that the home page displays how many calories I have left to spend each day, and that I can save a regular meal so I don’t have to reenter the information if I eat the same selections again. I am trying to keep within two pounds on either side of my target weight (and not to get stressed if my weight bounces up and down a bit).
One surprise with this health improvement journey is that in some areas, my skin has contracted at a slower rate than my muscles and other parts. Sometimes, this feels like being inside a deflating balloon. However, with regular walking and weight maintenance, my skin has continued to contract, so I hope to reach equilibrium in time. While losing weight, I bought successively smaller sizes of Gloria Vanderbilt Amanda jeans – for sale prices – so I could compare progress. I started at size 18. In July when I reached my goal, I was a size 10 but have now shrunk to a size 8, at the same weight.
My son Paul and I put together list below for a friend who recently started a weight loss journey using Noom. (This only represents our experience – your mileage may vary. Use a program that works for your health and way of doing things and you will be more likely to stick with it.)
Remember to drink / log plenty of water daily, makes you feel more full (at least ten cups of liquid per day)
Drink water 30 minutes before each meal
Read the Noom daily lessons, take advice that makes sense to you, ignore the rest
Noom’s group discussion function can help you be accountable for taking regular walks
Figure out a portion size metric (volume vs. weight) that works best for you, stick to the one metric for simplicity
Weigh in every day, expect lots of fluctuations (even five pounds up or down in one week) because of water retention
Write down your key body measures at the start so you can compare later (bust, waist, hips, around upper arm and upper leg), and to help you know what size you are
Weigh in, & log water and food on Noom daily, even if you are frustrated, or stuck/ plateaued. Getting stuck at one weight for weeks or months seems to be a usual part of the journey.
Drink a big glass of water after you weigh in each morning.
If you are on vacation or away from a scale, you can just repeat you last weight each day to keep the pattern going
Buy some clothes that fit as you reach each new size so you feel good about making progress. Thredup online consignment and thrift store is a good choice – for both cost and fashion choices. If you don’t love a clothing item, or it does not fit properly, do not buy it. If you bought it online, return it! You need to be happy with yourself and how you look.
Buy clothes by measurement, not size. My key measures and shape are different than they were when I was last at my current weight.
Some Noom (and Fooducate) food database entries are unrealistically low or high in calories – I think these are user-entered. When in doubt, break it down – log not a whole “serving” portion but the components (for example: green salad “serving” may be made up of mixed leafy greens + dressing + croutons, you can find individual calorie counts for each)
Walk or exercise every day and carry your smart phone so the steps count, to give you a better idea of how much you actually move. I use the Apple Health app on my iPhone which can share information with both Noom and Fooducate.
Add extra exercise under Noom’s “Track More Progress” if you do yard work, or exercise without your smart phone
On Noom, you can set “weight loss speed” under Noom settings (three lines at upper left of screen) from tortoise to cheetah, in case you want to go slower or faster
If you want to receive Katysblog posts by email, please sign up using the Sign Me Up! button (upper right on Katysblog home). Images Copyright 2022 by Katy Dickinson.
KatysBlog 